Getting my festive spirit on this weekend and taking part in the attempt to beat the Americans at a world record. I wouldn’t normally venture to Liverpool, however, if it means stopping those smug cousins across the pond from keeping the title of ‘Greatest Number Of Santas in a Run’ than I will. Because nothing is as irritating as a nation being arrogant about being fucking awesome at everything (I’m looking at you, Australia) and banging on about it. Besides, I got a free Santa suit which might come in handy for other yule-based activities.
The great shame about this event of course is that the organisers had to make some suits available in blue, because heaven forbid an Everton supporter would put soccer aside for something completely unrelated and wear the colour red even for half an hour. Still, you can always argue the ‘Coke created the red suit’ theory to mask your objectionable tastes in sport and abandonment of goodwill for your allegiance to a game that employs a distinctly high proportion of foreigners while you moan that immigrants steal ‘all the jobs’. Of course, they aren’t jobs you even want to do, and even if you did you’d only spend the cash on supporting your hypocrisy, sorry, beloved multicultural team.